Coalescence Kaijin Gets a Job is a short inspired by a certain comment on Ultraman Wiki about a Triple Fighter kaijin.
Story[]
Black Thunder, Black Killer and Kumoderan merged into ブラッダー and entered the office(They were confident that having three brains to think of answers to the questions would let them pass the interview.) The interviewer welcomed them.
- Interviewer: Hello...Urm...Mr...ブラッダー, what's your name in English?
- (speaking from ブラッダー's mouth)
- Black Killer(: I've translated our...erm..my English name, its "Bladder"
- Black Thunder: Yes yes. BLADDER
- Kumoderan: Yes, Brad..no..Blad, DERR
- Interviewer: (trying to hold back laughter) Okay okay I heard you the first time, Mr..Mr...Bladder...
- Interviewer: So, could you tell me a little about yourself?
- Black Killer: I..We..I mean I used to work for Demon, who wanted to conquer the Earth. Then..then...
- Kumoderan: Then we...I was killed by stupid Triple Fighter!!
- Interviewer: Killed?! What?! You're still here! Right now!
- Black Thunder: We..I was revived...Duhhh
- Interviewer: What kind of joke is this? Be serious or you'll be rejected!
- Black Thunder: I am serious, you nincompooo...
- Kumoderan: Shush! We don't want to ruin everything!
- Interviewer: Stop talking to yourself... Now tell me, why do you want this job at our company, Bluemark?
- Black Killer: We want to make action figures of ourselv...
- Black Thunder: No, no, no, what I mean is, we like kaiju figures that Bluemark makes...so..erm...we wanna help bring these awesome products to everyone (makes Bladder smile enthusiastically)
- Interviewer: (clap-clap-clap) We need more people...I mean...kaijin..I mean we need more people like kaijin like you!
- Black Thunder whispers: Bet he doesn't know what he's saying.
- Black Killer: Whatever it is, it sounds good
- Kumoderan: YASSS!!!
- Interviewer: Woah, talking to yourself again?
*Buzz Buzz Buzz*
Bladder suddenly stood up and shivered, spinning round and round.
- Black Thunder: Oh this is bad, We can't hold the fusion much longer!
- Kumoderan: We are going to separate back into ourselves! We gotta get outta here!
- Black Killer: I have an idea guys.
- Other 2 kaijin: What?
- Black Killer: I HAVE TO USE THE BATHROOM!
- Interviewer: Oh please go...
Bladder wriggled out the door
- Interviewer: Bladder emptying his bladder?...Hahahahahaahhaa..Such pun..hahaha
...Meanwhile, Bladder went into the toilet and un-coalescence.
- Black Killer: Phew, that was close
- Black Thunder: Did you guys think about it...if we actually got the job, how would we keep it a secret that we're not one kaijin but three merged together???
- Kumoderan: You're right! We cant hold the kaijin fusion for very long each time we merge...
The interviewer read the forms submitted by the kaijins.
- Interviewer: His full name is Coalescence Kaijin Bladder? Wait, coalescence? A fusion kaijin made of a few kaijin? Does that explain why he keeps talking to himself? Is that why he addresses himself as a "we"?
The interviewer dashed to the toilet to ask for the truth. The three kaijin were momenterilly stunned when they sighted the human coming in.
- Interviewer: Aha! I knew it! You are made up of three kaijin right?
- Black Thunder: Oh the great lighting balls! Busted!
- Kumoderan: Run!
Kumoderan sped past the interviewer knocking him off balance. Black Killer charged into him landing him face down on the floor. Black Thunder proceeded to stumble over him and out the toilet. The interviewer pulled on Thunder's tail causing him to fall and knock down the rest of the kaijin like dominos...
- Interviewer: Explain yourself! You will not just run away like that!!
- Kumoderan: Well guys, why don't we explain?
- Black Killer: Yes, explain...
- Black Thunder: I like explaining...
- Interviewer: What are you waiting for, go ahead!
A minute later... The interviewer stared frustratingly at the blank toilet cubicle door... He tried to get off the toilet seat but realised he is permanantly stuck on it by Kumoderan's webbing... Oh, and he was gagged with webbing too... Thunder and Killer pasted a sign on the cubicle door that said "Out of order. Please do not ever enter"
- Kumoderan: Now we still don't have a job...
- Black Killer: At least we did some explaining.
- Black Thunder: Yeah. Some good explaining.